Tuesday, October 04, 2005
i've nv felt so scared.....all my life.
seriously, dun think i'm gna do well. wad if i fail n retain? =( sudden emoism.
a spur of de moment dat i miss my darls alot. maybe cos i visualised de scene of me getting back my results n dere were smiles n laughters on deir faces dat dey got promoted while i got retained. n de sadness on deir faces aft i break de news. ok. shall stop all these rubbish now. i dunno y. but my heart cant set free. it's being strangled by stress - stressed by fear. i'm sooO damn scared. lik really.
i hav a very very bad feeling abt my performance dis time. de more i study, de more scared i become.. but cos i dun study hard, i dun study enough, dat adds on to my fear when i study now.. hard to comprehend eh?
RETAIN - dis word. cant get out of my head. if only i could pry open my skull n scrape it out clean.
shit shit shit shit shit.. damn damn damn damn damn. RAHHHHHHHHH!
i wanna die. but i scared to die. so sad.
one n only wish - to get promoted to J2 dis year.
