Friday, February 11, 2005
SOMEONE din come sch today..=( soOo sad la! sch's so boring today cos i cannot look forward to seeing him. he's my motivation to stay in sch. hee..=X my grp of frenz & i gave him dis nickname called magic pen. hee! not gonna tell u all why. or u'll noe his name le. haha! i got dis idea originated frm my best bud, fiona poh! hee.. nono.. shld be her mama gave us de idea de.. hor fiona? (wad's ur surname in chinese? FU ar? LOlx.) den we oso gave another SOMEONE (someone no.2) a nickname. called banana. hee.. oso, my class peeps will noe who la. of cos! magic pen is no. 1. banana is.. haha! dun really hav dat strg feeling.. but very sad lor.. heard dat magic pen very buaya (flirt) & got a gf le.. SAD rite?! but its ok la.. haha! all are jus eye candies at de end of de day.
cos i think i'm suffering frm post break up depression. dunno if dere's really such an illness. i cre8 myself de. dat's how i felt anyway. soOo moody. but nv really show. i muz keep smiling! so my mood wun get any worse. but sometimes, its really terrible actin so happy all de time.. actin i've no troubles at all.. haha! life's short.. i shld cherish every single minute to keep myself happy & away frm de sorrowful memories. haiz.. i'm doing all dese (noticing guys) for wad?? to shift my attention to other guys? or jus tryin to get myself used to singlehood again? cos when i used to be single, which was 9 mths ago?, i tend to be kinda fickle & mean to guys.. now i get my retribution. i'm really sry for wad i've did. but i meant no harm all along.. God, i noe my mistakes le.. pls forgive me..=( alrite! i'll start my life all over again!=D i giv up holding on to de hope dat me & him will get back together one day le.. cos he's really actin very evil towards me aft break up. i regret neglectin my frenz at times when i was wif him.. i'm really sorry.. but i cant bring myself to admit dat i regret loving him.. we do hav very very very hapy times together which were my inalienable memories. but if we cant work out, i cant blame anyone but myself. it's ok giel! pull urself togther & move on wif life.. haha! dun think i'll get together or fall in love so soon. wanna conc on my A lvl & go overseas. no use gettin a bf now when i noe it'll nv last when i go overseas.
but i still do believe dat dere's someone out dere for me.. me for him, & him for me. maybe is one of my ex, or maybe is someone i noe now, or maybe is someone i've nv met b4.. i noe i'll find him one day & live a happy life.. form a happy family.. & find my utopia, my fairytale story..=)
